The 5C Guide to Beginning Ancestor Work
There’s a question that I’m asked often, particularly by my clients who can feel the call of their ancestors but don’t know how to respond: how do I start working with my ancestors?
The answer: there are many roads leading to the same destination - some good, some great, some terrible. The road that I’m choosing to illumine is one paved by the successes and mistakes not only of my own, but that of my teachers, my elders, my ancestors, and all who I have learned from by observation or assistance. The road is about as perfect as the person who walks it, but that’s exactly how it should be.
Here’s how it goes:
Call on your higher self.
Catalogue the cycles and challenges.
Clean up your heart.
Clear the way.
Call on your ancestors.
Let’s get into detail, step by step.
Step One: Call on Your Higher Self.
One of the most common phrases among Ifa practitioners is: “before you call upon the Orisa, call upon your Ori.” Outside of that tradition, however (because Ori work is tradition-specific), the following is similarly true: working with your self-aspects, including your higher self, should be the foundation of your spirit work.
I’ll give an example: without tending to yourself and your connection to your higher self through spiritual hygiene practices, it may be difficult for you to distinguish between what’s you, what’s bias/fear/projection, and what’s your ancestors. You also may be at risk of interpreting manifestations of your personal hopes as the will of the divine, or the will of your ancestors.
And there are a lot of benefits to starting your ancestor work with higher self work. For one, it helps you work through any challenges that would become liabilities in your ancestor work - such as having weakened boundaries, or an incapacitating fear of others’ disapproval. Secondly, it steadies the foundation of your confidence and your competency in dealing with the immaterial. Thirdly but perhaps most importantly, your higher self work will keep you in alignment with all of you and ensure that you’re walking the path that is most soul-correct. Without higher self work, sometimes we pick up something that resonates without checking to see what that thing is resonating with. You might be surprised what no longer resonates with you to continue doing after a few months (hell, weeks) of higher self work.
Having a strong connection to your higher self allows you to receive guidance from other sources with greater clarity. I’ve known higher self work to increase intuitive and psychic faculties. It also gradually increases intuitive and psychic capacity, which is VERY important for ancestor work. For an esoteric practice, the experience is surprisingly quite physical.
If you’ve never worked with your higher self before, consider taking the spiritual bath outlined in Purification for the People - or at least following through the instructions, which provide some insight into how to start praying. The link to that is at the bottom of this article!
Step Two: Catalogue the Cycles and Challenges.
Y’all. If I had a dollar for every time a bloodline cycle or challenge reared its head early into somebody’s ancestor work experience, I’d - well I’d be doing the exact thing I’m doing now, but I’d probably have paid off my student loans by now. We often reach for our ancestors when we’re smack dab in the middle of a cycle, can see the cycle spinning on the horizon, when we just got out of the cycle, or when we fear the cycle so strongly its ears start to burn. Oftentimes we don’t even know what the cycle or challenge is - we just know difficulty as well as our cousins on our mother’s side. We know struggle like an older sibling. Like something that has just always been.
But you’ll find that cataloguing the cycles and challenges of your immediate family (and then further out) isn’t just about learning the name of them: to navigate and shift them, you must also know their provenance. In this way, you’ll discover what has been growing and evolving alongside your bloodline. I also recommend cataloguing your personal cycles and challenges and comparing/contrasting when you’ve got both catalogues started.
Here are some questions to jump-start your cataloguing process:
What is one condition (for example: heart disease) that your family has chronically struggled with? What else has often happened concurrently with that condition? When you try to trace the source, what do you find? Keep in mind that the condition need not be medical or even material - it can also be spiritual, such as folks taking a certain type of disposition or creativity being stifled in the family.
What is one cycle (for example: strained relationships between fathers and sons) that your family has chronically struggled with? When you attempt to identify the steps and stages in that cycle, what do they appear to be? Has anyone succeeded in disrupting the cycle before? Breaking it? If so, what happened? Where is that relative now? How do others respond to them?
What is one pattern (for example: punishing male children for being emotionally vulnerable) that your family has chronically struggled with? What is that pattern comprised of (for example: fear of admitting being wrong)? What kinds of rationales, fears, refrains, and narratives are used whenever someone challenges that pattern?
What is one challenge (for example: religious dogma) that your family has chronically struggled with? What habits, behaviors, pains and practices keep members of your family stuck in that challenge?
You don’t have to complete the catalogue in full before you start calling on your ancestors, but at least get it started before you do. Having that catalogue will help you to understand things like:
Why ancestors from the last two generations may or may not show up to your altar call
WHO is showing up to your altar call - for good or for ill
Why your ancestors may ask for a lot, a little, or nothing at all
Why you petition them for a thing and it has a specific, limited or undesirable result
The parameters of your ancestors’ hopes and dreams, why it may be healing for you to work on envisioning a brighter future together - and why some of your ancestors might be scared as hell of that
If you’re a Black person looking to do ancestor work on this kind of level, know that The Alchemical Altar Workbook has a exercises that help you complete this step with the help of your ancestors. In fact, if you complete the exercises in order, what you get is a life-altering evocation at the end that calls your ancestors in and strengthens your altar work. Links at the bottom of this article!
Step Three: Clean Up Your Heart.
This is a step that’s important to include because you may - whether you realize it or not - have hidden fears, resentments, and frustrations that have not been given safe expression. This can cause you to approach your ancestors with unconscious fear and apprehension when in actuality it’s safe to approach with warmth and joy. It can also cause you to project upon your ancestors something that isn’t actually there. Healing takes time in ways that cleaning might not, though, which is why I didn’t make healing your heart a prerequisite to working with your ancestors. Healing is a process. Some of your ancestors can help you with it, but some may need to heal right alongside you at that altar. Cleaning up your heart, so to speak, makes it possible for you to distinguish what’s actually required of y’all. Without fear.
Here’s three suggestions for completing this step:
Jot down a list of fears/anxieties about ancestor work, if you have any. Bring them to your higher self in prayer each day for a week and see what happens. You may actually begin to receive ancestral encouragement as a result, but it depends on the family and who’s trying to reach you from jump.
When you pray to your higher self - and later, your ancestors - place your hand over your heart when speaking if possible. If you use ASL as your primary or part-time means of non-written communication, center your awareness on your heart area as you sign to your ancestors. Or, tap that space 21 times (trust me on this) before you begin your prayer. Quite frankly, no matter your mode of communication. I recommend that tap count regardless. It opens the way. Tap it 21 times after you’re done praying to “close out” but not necessarily close “up.”
Bring some of your heart-level concerns to a close through your spiritual hygiene practice. If you try the spiritual bath recommended at the end of this article, folks have reported quite a bit of removal of emotional and other encumbrances. You can remove bodily-held “stuff” bit by bit through your higher self spiritual work - see why it’s a good first step? - until you feel confident enough in your spiritual activities overall. Strongly consider praying into your teas, your meals, and water as well. Granted, these are only part of a full spiritual hygiene practice; make sure to ask your higher self for support in disengaging from any thought-patterns, habits, and relationship dynamics that are harming you at heart-level, not just soul-level. Some experience change in that area quickly, some not - whatever the pace of change, it is worth pursuing.
Of course, if you have the ability to work with a licensed mental health practitioner - not just a seasoned spiritual practitioner - who can support you as you address what comes up for you at this step, then don’t hesitate to do so. If you don’t already have a practitioner that you trust, ask your higher self for guidance and connection with the correct practitioner for you. This is especially so in situations where things seem too difficult or too scary to address.
Step Four: Clear the Way.
This is often where people start their “intro to ancestor work” process, actually! In the 5C process, it’s the penultimate one. Steps 1 through 3 will make completing this step so much easier, you might be very surprised how quickly it all comes together and with what ancestral encouragement.
Here’s what clearing the way looks like:
Identifying what kind of physical space you can hold for your ancestors. Some people can afford to do a table altar; some folks can only do a shelf, or a corner of a kitchen counter. Still others can only safely keep an altar in their rooms away from the scrutiny of certain family members (however - that specific issue is why honoring steps 1-3 of this guide is so critical). Whatever space you can give your ancestors within reason, set it aside in your mind before you begin to tidy and cleanse that space.
Identifying what kind of day-to-day space you can hold for your ancestors. Establish your baseline - that baseline should reflect your personal boundaries and needs, any general demands on your time and energy that are already made of you, your emotional needs (are you someone who needs space after major conversations? For example), etc. If you have the intention of developing discipline in your spiritual work, cool, but establish that baseline first and then gradually begin to push that baseline. With the support of your higher self and your ancestors, you’ll achieve that goal more steadily.
Cleansing your home. An ancestor altar is a powerful thing. However, you may have things in your house that recognize this before you do - it happens a lot. I strongly discourage the use of sage for cleansing your home. Check out my guide to preparing a spiritual spray (link at the end of this article), if you’d prefer not to burn things in your home. Whether burning or spraying, I recommend using one of the following herbs below:
Woods and Barks: cedar, pine, white willow, cinnamon (pair it with something)
Nuts and berries: juniper, black pepper (pair it with something), black walnut hull (pair it with something)
Plants: coriander, basil, thyme, tobacco (pair it with something)
Resins: frankincense, myrrh, copal
Cleansing your ancestor space. If you’re using a cloth on the altar, launder it (can add vinegar to your wash cycle to remove stagnant energy); if the energy still feels stagnant even after cleansing your home, check the objects around that ancestor space and see what’s up. At this point in your process, your ancestors may already be nudging you about what to move out. If not, that’s okay - when they’re around and active, they will find ways to communicate with you.
Cleansing and choosing your tools. If you have a plate, mug, glass, and/or a Tupperware container that you’re dedicating to your ancestors, do so - and make sure no one else uses that. Pray into them, spray them with liquor and let them sit overnight before washing them and setting them aside for ancestral use. I also recommend designating a divinatory tool specifically for your ancestors to use and communicate with you through. Traditional to Black spiritual systems is 4 cowries or 4 pennies; non-Black folks may be able to employ other yes/no tools (such as seashells, tree branches or twigs, stones, hand-carved runes, discs, etc.) that are bloodline-traditional. You don’t have to use the Tarot or a deck. When you’ve connected with your ancestors, ask them to show you what tools they want to speak through and cleanse those accordingly.
Setting up your ancestor altar. Conventional wisdom is: a candle, a glass of water, a plant, and the personal effects of your ancestors. If you don’t have their personal effects, that’s okay - you can get objects associated with their homes, their familiar spaces, their favorite things and games, etc. Objects of affinity are powerful. You may not be able to make space for all of that - do what you can. If you include photos of your ancestors, make sure no one living is in the photos. You can also write the names of the ancestors that you DO trust and/or want to work with, and then breathe thrice into the list of names before setting it on your altar. When making a candle offering, consider setting the candle next to that list of names so that the light touches every name there. For ease, you can technically shape that list like a circle.
Master tip: those of you of a certain persuasion may find that collecting herbs from ancestral locations (or sourcing them from there) and keeping them on your altar may radically change how your ancestors work with your altar. A bunch of lavender to an uncle who grew up next to a field of them can mean more than you think.
Choosing how you call and close out. Some folks use the Kardecian spiritist practice of knocking thrice to open an ancestral altar visit, then knocking twice to close out; I myself recommend this strategy to folks until/unless they’re comfortable expanding into other means, such as: song, tapping on the altar until ancestral presence is felt, playing music, working with a rattle or bell, etc. You can also bring this to your higher self and ask them to help you flag down your ancestors straight-up. You’d be surprised how well that actually works, especially in situations where you don’t necessarily trust specific troubled relatives to not come and trouble you.
A special note about incense: it’s traditional in some cultures to light incense to call down ancestors, and folks from those cultures may find that all they have to do is light a stick and their folks will come rushing in. However, not everyone has that easy precedent. Incense does work to call ancestors, but my strong recommendation is praying into the incense you use - and even preparing your own ancestral blend using smells and herbs that are bloodline-familiar. Apple pie incense might get you pretty far, you know?
Step 5: Call on Your Ancestors.
Once you’ve reached this step, you might find that calling upon your ancestors is way more easeful (if not downright easy) than you’d imagined it to be! If you got here and you’re still not sure what kind of opening prayer to use when calling in your ancestors, no worries: I’ll give you an example flow:
Honest ancestors of my blood, please come on by
Honest ancestors of my bone, please come on by
Sure as the sun circles ‘round the earth
And eagles fly
Honest ancestors, come right on by
Repeat this bit 9x, then start naming your ancestors that you know and want to work with; after that, go into a freestyle prayer connecting to your ancestors. You can also use a flow like below as either part of the above evocation or as a standalone:
I, [full name], child of [mother’s name] and [father’s name], the grandchild of [name grandparents], call upon the honest ancestors who are blood of my blood, bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh - you who are of my bloodline, let us meet here at the altar. You who lived long before me, let us meet here at the altar. Your sacrifices are not in vain - your hard work, still felt. Please come and join me at this altar, that [we may work together/that you might hear my heart/that I might have your help/etc.].
then proceed to present your offerings to them. A good safe first offering is water and a portion of your meal - those who didn’t identify any serious issues with liquor, fire, or smoke can offer those items as well. Then sit with them, talk with them, meditate. When ready, thank your folks for their time, close out, and go about your day/evening.
After a few visits (and you trust the feeling of your ancestors showing up), you may feel comfortable divining to them for acceptance of offerings. I don’t recommend using divination to your ancestors for anything other than that until you’ve built a solid relationship with your ancestors and higher self - waiting until that point will help you sidestep a LOT of early divination pitfalls. Use the divination tool chosen in Step Four to check in with your ancestors about offerings brought, satisfaction with your altar, etc. Your following the previous four steps will not only prepare you for a solid, stable divinatory practice to your ancestors, but prepare you to later initiate pattern and cycle-breaking work with your ancestors much later on.
In conclusion
You may already be at some point in this process - you may even be looking to revamp your ancestral practice - at the time that you discover this guide. A number of you may also come to this guide after having been burned by adverse ancestor work experiences, which I pray you make a full and robust recovery from. My prayer is that wherever you are in your experience, this guide empowers you to connect with your ancestors from a place of trust, knowing, alignment, and personal power.
This guide is not culturally-specific for a number of reasons, which is why certain things traditional to African Traditional and Diasporic practices have been very much left out. Their absence from this public page is intentional. For very specific and personalized guidance on how to do things our way, please do not hesitate to contact me or another Black spiritual practitioner that you trust.
Mentioned and Recommended Links
Purification for the People: A Flexible Spiritual Cleansing Ritual (click here)
How-To: Building a Rapid-Prep Spiritual Spray (click here)
The Alchemical Altar Workbook (click here)
Getting ancestor dreams? Check out “the Dreamwalker’s Guide to Oneiromantic Clarity (click here).”
Looking to bring your practice closer to your roots? Check out “A Guide to Demystifying Your Spiritual Framework (click here).”
